Initiation Ride
By Linda Schwartz

Who are you? I do not now. Separated for 15 years, not by choice. The pain, there are no words. A parent should never have bury a child.

But no greater joy was felt when I opened my eyes and I saw you standing over me, a stranger at first, but the, "Peter". I was stunned. You told me the only thing that had changed about me in 15 years was my eyes. Then you came to me, I wished I could gather you in my arms but the I.V. prevented it. You laid your head against my chest and wept. I ran my hand over your soft hair, HAIR! The last time we were together you were a young boy with a shaved head.

You pulled back, anger, shock, rage and sadness crossd your very expressive, handsome face. That much had not changed, but so much had. You said we had so much reaching out to do..... Yes, my son, we do... .. Part 2

Who are you, the words echo in my head, no longer a stranger, and yet still I do not know you. I must find out. I come to you, at the precinct. You are not at your desk so I sit and wait. "Pop", I hear you call to me. I look up at you and smile. "What are you doing here, is anything wrong." You ask, concerned about me. I tell you no. I want to spend the day with you. You misunderstand at first. I tell you I wish to spend this day with you. Your surprised, but I tell you that "to truly know a man you have to see him at his labors."

You agree, a smile comet to your face. Agreeing that we need to really get to know each other. we begin our day of discovery.

I learn how difficult and dangerous you job is. My eyes look at your with great pride.

A young woman wants to take her life because she believes her child is lost to her, I tell her of how, I too, had lost a child. All the while you looked on, I opened my heart to her, but the words were meant for your ears. And you heard. I could tell you were touched, you never saw the dept of my pain before.

I, too, learn of the dept of your pain, my son. When you meet the boy from the orphanage. You tell him how that place scared the hell out of you. And I thought how it must have been for you at that orphanage. Your pain cut through me like a knife.

We still have so much to teach each other, but now we're on that path together.

I love you my son......